The Bridegroom

I’m not too sure what to think about this story. In some ways I agree with the response to homosexuality of the father in law. But in other ways I think that he may have over reacted.

This story starts out with a man taking his brother’s daughter after he dies and raising her. She is not attractive at all. On page 92 the uncle describes Beina. “What had caught his heart? Did he really like her fleshy face, which often reminded me of a blowfish?” He is talking about Beina’s suitor. His name is Baowen and he is an extremely attractive man that could have just about any woman that he wanted. But for some reason he out of the blue marries this unattractive girl. The uncle is skeptical about why this happened. But he relived that Beina has a husband to take care of her and provide for. The uncle really tries to make their marriage a success and for a while it seems to be going well.

After a time Baowen gets arrested for involvement in a gay gathering. This is viewed as a criminal offense in this eastern country. Baowen had done nothing “wrong” so far but on page 97 he states. “I – I liked a man in the club, a lot. If he’d asked me, I might’ve agreed.” At this time we know for sure that he is a homosexual.
In this country very little was known about homosexuality. The overriding opinion is that it is a sickness that can be cured. This is very interesting because I have never thought of it this way before. I am trying to put myself in people’s shoes that have not been exposed to this type of behavior before. It must have been very strange and I can see why it was considered a crime. But now it is very widely accepted and not uncommon. I wonder if there are more homosexuals now than before or now they make it more known.

From the beginning of their marriage in the story I was suspecting that something was wrong. This completely explains everything. Baowen states that he was doing Beina a favor by marrying her and keeping his homosexuality a secret. This is because she seems indifferent to this. I don’t understand this at all. It makes no sense that she would want to remain married to a gay man. But maybe he was the first person to treat her right without caring about her looks.

Baowen is sent to a mental hospital to get “cured”. But obviously this had no effect because he had relations with a male nurse and then was convicted of criminal activity. This was the last straw for the uncle. He could not be associated with this type of behavior. It looked bad on him and his niece. But at the end of the story we find that Beina still doesn’t care about her husband’s actions. On page 115 the uncle shares how he feels. “Well, it’s impossible for me to have a criminal as my son-in-law. I’ve been humiliated enough. If you want to wait for him, don’t come to see me again.” At this point he picks up his hat and leaves his niece.

One thing that I really admired about this story is Beina’s attitude. She remained calm throughout the entire episode and still remained in love with her husband. This shows how much spouses can look over when they become soul mates. It is kind of neat to see how other cultures view homosexuality. I haven’t thought about this much, but after reading this I am more aware of these difference

A Wife's Story

This story was very interesting to me. I liked how the Indian lady was watching the play Glengarry Glen Ross, because I already know what it is about. I wasn’t at first familiar with what a Patel is. I looked this up and found that it is A surname of Indian origin (Hindu and Parsi) from a Gujarati word meaning village headsman. In the play that the narrator was watching these Patel’s were degraded and put down. After the play she decides that she needs to write to the author of the play, David Mamet. For some reason when I was reading this play earlier I remember something about this controversy.

The narrator is married but living in New York City getting her PHD while her husband is still in India. She lives with an oriental woman who is a hand model. This story reminds me very much of my girlfriend. Her mother is Korean and moved to the United States when she was in her twenties. My girlfriend has told me many stories of her mother and also of herself and how difficult is sometimes is to be different. Her mother came and got an education and then married. But she has the mindset that her daughter must have a successful career to be considered a working member of society. This is a very different view from mine but I understand it. This story kind of shows this also. Because immigrants work so hard and are not treated right. On page 26 the narrator states “I don’t hate Mamet. It’s the tyranny of the American dream that scares me. First, you don’t exist. Then you’re invisible. Then you’re funny. Then you’re disgusting. Insult, my American friends will tell me, is a kind of acceptance. No instant dignity here.” This statement kind of sums up the way immigrants are treated.

The narrator’s husband comes to visit and is a completely different person than she remembered from india. Instead of the prudent and thrifty man he was there now he is out of his element. But he does seem to enjoy exploring the city. On page 33 the narrator shares “He looks disconcerted. He’s used to a different role. He’s the knowing, suspicious one in the family. He seems to be sulking, and finally he comes out with it. “You’ve said nothing about my new glasses.” I complimented him on the glasses, how chic and Western-executive they make him look. But I can’t help the other things, necessities until he learns the ropes. I handle the money, buy the tickets. I don’t know if this makes me unhappy.”

I see this as the woman kind of enjoying being able to play a bigger role than if she was in india. Here she is more important and he is confused and like a child. I can imagine how this must before for him. He is used to being in control of everything and now the roles are reversed. But he seems to accept it because he loves her. She takes him to see all the America has to offer and then she realizes on page 34 “There’s so much I already take for granted.” How much more true is this of us who are so used to the comforts we have every day.

To go along with this he seems to notice that his wife attracts other men. Maybe this isn’t true but he feels threatened because he doesn’t know what is going on. I tend to think that this would be how I would feel. I know that I like to be in control and never have to ask for assistance. We can see this everyday in watching the asian students around campus. Sometimes when they are in my classes they seem intimidated by the other students. But other times they seems to excel and thrive.

In my girlfriends case she has learned from her mother some very important lessons and I have too. Her mother has developed her own identity here and doesn’t care what others think about her.

Movie (Monday March 22)

Stone Reader Blog for Monday March 22, 2010

I was anticipating this part of the movie since last Friday. I really wanted to know how it ended up. Whether Dow would be crazy or perfectly normal. This really interested me because there had been so much build up to the end of the movie.

We find that Mark is still trying to learn more about Mossman before he actually goes to meet him. Mark meets with Dan, one of Dow’s old classmates. Dan shares that Dow was consumed with the book and would work on it for 20 hours straight at times. Dan shares how he may have had some influence in the book because he was mentioned several times. Particularly about how we wrote to Dow when he was in Vietnam. Dan believes that this book is a very good read for people in this time of age.

Mark’s next move is to go and see Mossman in Iowa City. During this first meeting we don’t actually see Dow. But Marks shares how it was sort of awkward in that Dow answered the door then left to go upstairs without saying a word. He returned with a copy of the stones of summer.

Next Mark meets with Dow’s old agent for the book. His agent remembers Dow’s book and tries to explain why it failed to gain much attention. Mark states that he would like to get Dow’s book back into print and wonders if that is a possibity.

Mark again meets with Dow to discuss the book. Dow shares how he stopped writing after the book. And he was taken to a hospital because he had acute anxiety. He states that it took him ten years to get over it. One part that I really like is how he thought of the book. He considers it unfinished and open ended. This is very interesting to me. I can kind of understand that, he worked so hard on something that it became his life and his life is still going and therefore the book is still going. All of this is in his mind. He compares this to Shakespeare in that he always writes his book in his mind and has it memorized. Maybe he has another novel in his mind that he would like to write someday. I think of my life that way sometimes. It is like an ongoing narrative in my head and I can remember almost all of it.

The movie ends and we find that because of this movie the stones of summer is now in print through Barnes and Nobel. I hope that Dow sees some of the profit from this rebirth of the book. Mark spent a lot of time working on this movie and I was very glad that it came to fruition.

I don’t know how many books are out there that need “rediscovering”. This is a very admirable thing to do for someone and society. There are probably thousands of books out there that were written but never got the right attention.

In conclusion I really enjoyed this movie, even though the beginning was kind of boring and slow. I would recommend it to others.

Movie (Friday Mar. 12)

This section of the movie was even more interesting than the first section. One thing that I noticed immediately is that Mark seems to have been doing more chores around the house. So this means I have to take back what I said in the first blog. I like to see this and am glad that he is taking a more manly role. Such as cutting wood and removing leaves from the pond.

Back to his quest for Dow Mossman. Mark makes just about every attempt to find out more about this author and seems to be making very little progress. He knows that Mossman attended the Iowa’s Writers workshop in the 1970’s. So he began by talking with a student that was there during the same time that Mossman was. His name is Bruce. Bruce speaks highly of Mossman’s writing in the Stones of Summer. But again he had never heard of Mossman. Gives Mark some names of other students at that time who might be familiar with Mossman. One person that he talks about is William Cutter Murray, who the book is dedicated to. Murray was an instructor at the Iowa Writer’s Workshop and was very instrumental in helping Bruce develop his work.

Next Mark flies to Florida to find the designer of the book cover. This man has no idea or recollection of Mossman or anything related to the book. This seems to be the answer that Mark is getting everywhere. At this point Mark is discouraged. He has spent the better part of a year working on this task and doesn’t think he is any closer. I can understand this. If my hard work doesn’t pay off like I want it to then I tend to want to move on to other things. But this shows a lack of perseverance on my part. I can learn from this movie to never give up. But Mark then finds that other people are buying the copies of the Stones of Summer very fast and wants to know why.

His next step is to go to Iowa to find Mossman. His first stop is the University of Iowa where he finds some manuscripts of Mossman’s. He learns very little from these manuscripts except that Mossman takes very good care of his work. After this he learns that William Murray is living close by. He then visits him and finds his first real clue. Murray mentions Mossman before Mark can. He talks about how Mossman was sent to an insane asylum after writing his book. This is because he put to much of himself into the book that it possessed him. Murray knows that Mossman in know living 30 miles away in Cedar Rapids.

There are a couple of things that I can identify with. One is how Mossman started to go crazy while writing his book. When I start working on something I tend to not be able to get it out of my mind until I complete it. Right now it is my senior design project that I can’t seems to get out. I can’t wait to the end of the movie when hopefully we get to meet Mossman.

Movie (Wednesday March 10th)

Blog for Wednesday March 10th movie.

I had my doubts about this movie when I started. Wasn’t sure what it was about, there seemed to be no story behind it. But as it went on I began to get into it and kind of enjoy it. This is because it is so different from the typical movie.
Basically Mark, the narrator and main character, is trying to get a better understanding of what has happened to Dow Mossman, the author of “The Stones of Summer”. This book is of interest to him because her first purchased this book in the 70’s after reading a book review by Professor John Sealy in the New York Times. At this time in the 70’s he was in high school and had pneumonia and that is why he was reading this book. But now for some reason he is unable to find very much information on the author, Mossman, and there seem to be very few other readers of this book. He begins to buy up different copies of this book wherever he can find it and give it to some of his friends that he thinks may be interested in it.

One thing that I found interesting is how he kept going back to explain his childhood. This explains his love for books in general and how they shaped his life. Some of the books he mentioned were familiar, such as the Hardy boy books. I used to read these when I was young. And I can still remember some of them. Much more than lots of other things from that long ago. Mark shares how a book called “Catch 22” really was the beginning of his literary love. He quoted how some stated “that one author can turn you into a reader”. This is true, if you find one book that really speaks to you then you will continue to look for more that do the same and it is an unending cycle. This is not something that has happened to me. But at some times I read a book that makes me want to continue reading others that are like it. Such as the “Band of Brothers” I tried to find other books like this one and read them all. Even the Borne series was kind of the same for me. When I was little I used to go to the public library and look at all books that are out there and want to look at all of them.

Back to the movie. Mark wants to have a better understanding of how some authors write an excellent book or novel. And then just stop writing and are never heard of again. This is what seems to have happened to Mossman. Mark visits one of his critic friend at the University of Buffalo to have a conversation about this phenomenon. This critic points out that some writers stop writing because their first book was so successful that they don’t feel that they can top the first one. Or even the other way around. Their book is so bad that they can’t write another one.

Mark then goes to John Sealy’s summer house in Maine to interview him about his literature review of “The Stones of Summer” and other books. Sealy is very receptive to his attempts to learn more about Mossman. But unfortunately he doesn’t know anything more than Mark does. But they have a good time discussing books that they both enjoy. This is the same for anyone that has something that they enjoy. I like to discuss fishing, guns and such with friends that have similar hobbies.

One thing that I didn’t like is how Mark talked about his wife. She seemed to be the one that does all the manual labor around the house and he doesn’t help at all. This is defiantly not how I was brought up and seems kind of backward to me.

"The Same River Twice" pp. 54-109

This section of “The Same River Twice” started with Chris and his wife having a sort of disagreement over a treatment for the unborn baby. In the end Rita won and they end up getting the test done. On page 58 it shows their reaction to finding out that their baby is ok so far. “An accompanying letter says that the test has shown them to structurally sound. The kid has a solid foundation. If it turns out to be a terrorist, the fault will be environmental, not genetic. Rita and I hug each other for what seems like hours.” If found this quote to be kind of strange. How Chris was already thinking that his baby would be different. For some reason maybe he thought that if his kid turned out weird then it wouldn’t be his fault.

Next we pick back up with Chris’s memories of his path to adulthood. He recalls his father and how he and his mother interacted. A statement on page 60 sums this up. “Her usual stance was a balancing act between loyalty to her children and to her husband. She raised us, but Dad controlled us.” This seems to be how most families are raised. The mother does the raising of the children and the father does the decision making. In a way I agree with this system but feel like the parents should work together a little better.

We now are listening to Chris share his stories. He is traveling across America hitchhiking. A “missionary” named Al picks him up. Al shares some of his crazy beliefs. He is basically begging God to come back and take him up to heaven and leave all the “sinners” behind. Also he believes that insects are little devils from Satan. Therefore he raises spiders to counteract this evil. Chris gets dropped off and Al prays that some else will pick him up in five minutes and sure enough someone does. A crazy man named Winner picks him up. Winner is a racist how believes that it is going to be his job to protect America when WWIII comes along. He stockpiles guns supposedly all over the states. Once Chris leaves Winner he is on the California shoreline. Chris stays on the beach for a while. He begins to draw some sketches and leave them for other people to find in hopes that they will like them and want to pay him for his drawing skills. But this dream is shattered when a man picks up one of his drawings and then throws it into the trash. This man states that the bums are no better than the trash they leave behind. Chris then revaluates his life plan and decides to move on from California. I kind of felt bad for Chris at this point. He was only trying to fit into society but he was too different for people to understand. I know that I do this to people sometimes. I don’t give them the time of day because they are so different from me.

Chris’s plan led him to Alabama. He met up with a traveling circus and joined on to be a laborer. At first he seems to have found a place where he fits in. Because everyone is kind of strange and weird they accept him for who he is. After a time he is give the opportunity to move up to play “Louie the Great Trained Walrus”. He wore this ridiculous suit and followed what his “trainer” would say. The trainer would have a dialogue with the walrus as an act with the audience. I found one part of this dialogue on page 105 to be very interesting.

“Kaybach (“trainer”) tossed a fish and asked the final question.”

“Are you a walrus, Louie?”

“I shook my head no.”

“Oh, I guess you think you’re human, then.”

“I nodded very fast.”

“I’m sorry, Louie. You’re nothing but a walrus. You’ll never be a man.”

This last statement seems to be very much what Chris is dealing with in the present. He is trying to discover what really a man is. And possibly his entire growing up he was trying to discover this answer. Not long after Chris becomes so sick of the circus that he leaves in the middle of the walrus act and causes a huge scene.